Sadness Sauce

Yes. There is such a thing, and yes. I am drowning in it. So back off.
Now, on topic of why i am drowning in sadness sauce:

I dont see why everyone is always annoyed with me. I try really hard not to be annoying.
Here is a list of 10 things i do to try not to be annoying:

1. I (attempt to) control my spaztic mannerisms
2. I (attempt to) listen much as is needed
3. I (attempt to) be silent as much as is needed
4. I try to mold how i look, say things, and dress after people who are liked. (embarrasing, but entirely MUCH to true. i dont do it ALL the time though, or as much as i should...... the black is not after anyone.... just saying so none of thou shalt believe me unto the liking of a poser. FOUL RECREANT KNIGHTS!!!!)
5. I try not to be big headed to cover up my increadbly low self esteem
6. I am as nice as possible, even to those i do not enjoy the company of
7. I try to be not as needy as i really am
8. I try to supress my feelings as much as possible (meaning if i am sad, i skip around and smile. Angry? i skip around and smile. Happy? ummm..... thats hard seeing as i am rarely TRULY happy. its mostly a fake happy that i make myself believe that i am feeling. wow,)
9. I try not to express my thoughts/beliefs....... NOT GREAT AT THAT ONE. NOT AT ALL.
10. I try to............................................................. just not be annoying. thats it.

As one could see, i am not very good at doing the things on my list. Except the feelings part. That is much easier than one would think.